And What Now?

Ros Capper has written And What Now? for those who are rebuilding after a major life change. Following is an extract from her book for other people facing life-altering challenges!

I think it is easy to imagine, without realizing it, that somewhere outside of us ‘there is a plan’, if only we can find it! Instead of hunting for a plan outside of ourselves, like a treasure hunt, creative enquiry encourages us to be aware of what is happening within ourselves as well as in our world: to notice, write down, and nourish. When you are ready, take action by playing with your own experiences of:

  • Hunches
  • Intuitive feelings
  • What we most enjoy
  • Quiet times in nature
  • The future we sense we prefer
  • Listening to favourite music
  • Where we choose to focus
  • Nurturing leisure times
  • Laughing at things we find funny
  • Displaying mementos we feel good looking at
  • Experimenting with colour
  • Appreciating small things
  • Celebrating the achievements of others
  • Contributing to our community
  • Initiating times with people we enjoy
  • Noticing and noting down our strengths
  • Writing down what we are telling ourselves (our stories)
  • Finding a key thread running through everything, to be emphasized

What if you are pausing or coming to a complete stop at the thought of stepping into your preferred future or dream? What if the map you imagine says: here be dragons? I experienced pausing, setting momentum aside, and anxiety (“publish a book, oh no!”). I find the following to be useful steps into unknown, unmapped territory:

  • Asking for help
  • Mapping the territory (‘mind map’)
  • Taking a break altogether from the momentum of the journey
  • Moving daily (beach walks, kayaks)
  • Sharing with interested and supportive others
  • Listening carefully to feedback and advice (soup group!)
  • Staying focused on my emerging preferred future
  • Accepting help with gratitude
  • Ensuring treat times

Purchase your own copy of Ros Capper’s books What Now? and her latest book, An Accidental Carer.  – see https://accidentalcarer.com/shop/

© Family Care NZ

RosCapper